Rare Pair Shorts

Honestly, making it practically an obligation to bring a date was more out of fashion than the huge shoulder pads her mother wore when Lavender was a baby
You had me laughing by Sentence 2, and thinking of those old episodes of Dynasty and Falcon Crest where you couldn't see their earrings for the stacks and stacks of shoulder pads.

"Plus one," she grunted, throwing the expensive piece of parchment another hateful look. "Haven't these people heard about the 21st century?"
From one single girl to another, I hear you, bb!

Oh bless her, the writer of the column without a date might well be next day's headlines for sure!

the always so perfect Granger
And the girl I love so much would COMPLETELY do that! *loves*

"I do remember you, funny boy
I just love her.

"That's the conviction I need," she said with a condescending smile,
I can just see this playing out in my head.

"Although she did almost come solo tonight. If she hadn't begged on her knees to my brother to get her a date for tonight and I weren't the great man that I am, she would have been dancing a waltz with her reflection on the women's restroom."
And that's what you get for thinking that you can make a Weasley man do as you wish. *shakes head* Oh, Lavender.

"Excuse me? Do you want me to cry? Because at this rate I will before the night ends!"
Oh bless her, she really did bite off more than she could chew. I waver between wanting to laugh at her and wanting to hug her.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Mystery Author. This was more than I could have hoped for. It was just pure pleasure all the way through. You took my favorite of all couples and wrote a Lavender so near and dear to my heart that I can't do anything but love her.

I loved this so much.