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rarepair_shortsAuthor: tania_sings
Recipient: flaminia_x
Title: The New Hot
Pairing: Hermione/Neville, Ron/Lee, Harry/Patil twins, one surprise pairing
Request:
1) Neville and Hermione - you know, where the good guy finally gets the hot chick.
2) Harry and the Patil twins - because one just isn't enough for the Boy who Lived!
Rating: PG
Word Count: 638
Dislaimer: Famous authors have better things to do
Summary: Nerds are sexy
Author's Notes: I didn't like the possibility of someone ending up without fic, so I wrote this bit of unabashed silliness. Hope two requests in one story is okay.
!
"I just don't understand it."
Dumbledore looked across the dining hall to see what was confusing his potions master. Apparently, the source of his befuddlement was Hermione Granger, who was currently happily seated on Neville Longbottom's lap.
"I mean... Granger was dating a Quidditch star, for Merlin's sake! Sure, she's no oil painting, but I know that her holding Krum's attention made the blokes wonder what little tricks she's picked up from those books she's always reading. And out of all them, she picks LONGBOTTOM???"
"Ah Severus, geeks are the new hot. Spots, high trousers, a breaking voice -- they all get the young witches' blood up these days."
Snape looked skeptical.
"Where on Earth did you hear that?"
The headmaster shrugged.
"Read it in 'Glamour'."
No further explanation was coming, and Snape doubted he'd want one.
"Okay, but how about THAT?"
He waved his arm at Ron Weasley and Lee Jordan feeding each other bits of spotted dick and laughing suggestively.
"Jordan's one of the most popular guys in the school, what with the quiddich and the spiders and the hair. And he's head over heels for a skinny, overgrown, freckly, ginger kid!"
"Freckly ginger beanpoles are the 'it' look these days Severus! Think of Lily Cole!"
Snape's brow furrowed.
"Who?"
"Never mind. Just trust me. It's the new hot."
Really, Dumbledore thought, Severus could stand to catch up with the times. The man clearly didn't even know hair masks had been invented.
"Oh, now that just takes the biscuit!"
Snape was staring, open-mouthed at Harry Potter, who was escorting both Padma and Parvati Patil to a table. The mix of pink and purple lipstick marks on the boy's face left little doubt as to why the trio was late to dinner.
"He wears glasses! He's got a great big scar slashed across his face. He still collects chocolate frog cards, most of his friends only hang out with him because they liked his dad, he's stunk of gillyweed for months now, he --"
"Severus, how many times must I tell you? All those things are what's making pulling so easy for Potter. The only way he could have it better would be if he wore Vulcan ears. Listen carefully man! Geeks. Are. The. New. Hot."
Severus took a deep breath and made a visible effort to collect himself. When he spoke again, it was in a trembly, petulant little voice.
"I just don't understand why it wasn't like that when I was a student. I had a bad haircut, and stupid clothes, and a bed-wetting problem, and all I got was wedgies."
Dumbledore smiled sympathetically, and put his hand on Snape's knee.
"Just born in the wrong time, I suppose. If it's any consolation, these days, little Sevvie would be a babe magnet".
Snape pouted. Dumbledore leaned in closer.
"And just so you know Severus, I, for one, am very into the new hot."
With that, the headmaster gave Snape's thigh a cheeky pinch, before heading off towards the stairs to his office.
Dumbfounded, Snape sat in his chair for a moment, stunned. Across the hall, the Patil twins were nibbling on Potter's stick-out ears. Jordan was admiring how much ankle Weasley showed in his too-short robes and Granger was stroking Longbottom's mimbus mibletonia.
Then, he jumped to his feet and scrurried off after Dumbledore, robes billowing behind him. After all, who knew how long the new hot would last?
Recipient: flaminia_x
Title: The New Hot
Pairing: Hermione/Neville, Ron/Lee, Harry/Patil twins, one surprise pairing
Request:
1) Neville and Hermione - you know, where the good guy finally gets the hot chick.
2) Harry and the Patil twins - because one just isn't enough for the Boy who Lived!
Rating: PG
Word Count: 638
Dislaimer: Famous authors have better things to do
Summary: Nerds are sexy
Author's Notes: I didn't like the possibility of someone ending up without fic, so I wrote this bit of unabashed silliness. Hope two requests in one story is okay.
!
"I just don't understand it."
Dumbledore looked across the dining hall to see what was confusing his potions master. Apparently, the source of his befuddlement was Hermione Granger, who was currently happily seated on Neville Longbottom's lap.
"I mean... Granger was dating a Quidditch star, for Merlin's sake! Sure, she's no oil painting, but I know that her holding Krum's attention made the blokes wonder what little tricks she's picked up from those books she's always reading. And out of all them, she picks LONGBOTTOM???"
"Ah Severus, geeks are the new hot. Spots, high trousers, a breaking voice -- they all get the young witches' blood up these days."
Snape looked skeptical.
"Where on Earth did you hear that?"
The headmaster shrugged.
"Read it in 'Glamour'."
No further explanation was coming, and Snape doubted he'd want one.
"Okay, but how about THAT?"
He waved his arm at Ron Weasley and Lee Jordan feeding each other bits of spotted dick and laughing suggestively.
"Jordan's one of the most popular guys in the school, what with the quiddich and the spiders and the hair. And he's head over heels for a skinny, overgrown, freckly, ginger kid!"
"Freckly ginger beanpoles are the 'it' look these days Severus! Think of Lily Cole!"
Snape's brow furrowed.
"Who?"
"Never mind. Just trust me. It's the new hot."
Really, Dumbledore thought, Severus could stand to catch up with the times. The man clearly didn't even know hair masks had been invented.
"Oh, now that just takes the biscuit!"
Snape was staring, open-mouthed at Harry Potter, who was escorting both Padma and Parvati Patil to a table. The mix of pink and purple lipstick marks on the boy's face left little doubt as to why the trio was late to dinner.
"He wears glasses! He's got a great big scar slashed across his face. He still collects chocolate frog cards, most of his friends only hang out with him because they liked his dad, he's stunk of gillyweed for months now, he --"
"Severus, how many times must I tell you? All those things are what's making pulling so easy for Potter. The only way he could have it better would be if he wore Vulcan ears. Listen carefully man! Geeks. Are. The. New. Hot."
Severus took a deep breath and made a visible effort to collect himself. When he spoke again, it was in a trembly, petulant little voice.
"I just don't understand why it wasn't like that when I was a student. I had a bad haircut, and stupid clothes, and a bed-wetting problem, and all I got was wedgies."
Dumbledore smiled sympathetically, and put his hand on Snape's knee.
"Just born in the wrong time, I suppose. If it's any consolation, these days, little Sevvie would be a babe magnet".
Snape pouted. Dumbledore leaned in closer.
"And just so you know Severus, I, for one, am very into the new hot."
With that, the headmaster gave Snape's thigh a cheeky pinch, before heading off towards the stairs to his office.
Dumbfounded, Snape sat in his chair for a moment, stunned. Across the hall, the Patil twins were nibbling on Potter's stick-out ears. Jordan was admiring how much ankle Weasley showed in his too-short robes and Granger was stroking Longbottom's mimbus mibletonia.
Then, he jumped to his feet and scrurried off after Dumbledore, robes billowing behind him. After all, who knew how long the new hot would last?
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